One of the favorite staff catchlines around OWN offices is: “Call now, because we can’t do this all day” patented by that annoying guy from ShamWow! infomercials.

You can’t make this stuff up. In a story titled “ShamWow Pitchman Beats Hooker to the Punch” TMZ explains how the ShamWow! guy beat the hooker up because she was biting his tongue and would not let go:

“Shlomi began kissing the hooker when she allegedly “bit his tongue and would not let go.”

“According to cops, Shlomi then punched the prostitute several times until she released his tongue. Both the prostitute and Shlomi were arrested for felony aggravated battery.”

And of course, it happened in Miami.  Here is some more stuff data.

As one of the guys noted, upon review of the page above, the price seems steep. $1000 for that? Who comes up with hooker valuation models? In the event that the service delivery does not go as expected, what is the proper protocol for remediation of john-hooker disputes? Assuming that the pimp is the agent of the hooker he can’t be trusted to deliver a fair verdict, so is that disclosed during the sales process as one party waives it’s rights? So many questions. Another employee noted that hookers carry diseases so you need to make sure they don’t create any open wounds. I learn something new every day.

This is why I work in an executive office far, far away from you people

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