Vlad switches to Zune!

Microsoft
3 Comments

I take back every bad thing I ever said about Microsoft Zune. Now they are talking to my market! (25–34 male with expendable income). I’m of course talking about the story from Chicago titled: Gift Was Not What They Expected: The Zune came packed with porn!

Now where the heck is THAT version on sale. Hey Zune folks, I want the marketing lead on this project! Step into the social? expendable heck no, Step into.. well, I shouldn’t say this out in public, I don’t want to mess up the marketing campaign.

Microsoft Christmas 2006: Give the gift of porn!

Now with 25% of vibrating Xbox controller.

Ipod has the U2 Ipod? Oh, the Vlad(tm) Zune(r) would come in three initial packages:

Ron Jeremy Zune 
For ladies in those long winter months, the plastic casing can become quite uncomfortable. The Ron Jeremy Zune would instead be coated with hair and a slightly elongated form format.

Paris Hilton Zune
For your ultra-organized geek on the go. The Paris Hilton Zune would come with a sticky coat on the back so it would not fly all over the car when you drove around. Paris Hilton Zune would also be 50% lighter than the other editions.

Jenna Jameson Zune
This of course would be the collectors item. The back panel would be replaced by a bumpy gel surface that can be used…um… for stress relief purposes. Like a gel ball.

If you see me post here with a v– alias (Microsoft contractor/vendor) you better sink all your money into Belkin. Talk about the accessories market!

Shockey Monkey Activations

Shockey Monkey
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Just giving you an ETA update on Shockey Monkey. We’re very excited here, there are over 2,000 folks that already got all their stuff ready:

Dear Partners,

I wanted to take a moment and update you on the status of your activation.

As you know this is the holiday season for most of our planet and folks are taking the opportunity to spend time with family (and away from computers) for a little while. Considering most of you have been kept from your helpdesks for at least a month or two we felt it would be wrong for us to start imposing deadlines on people so we’re being a little more patient and letting people that are on vacations catch up with their email and give us the info we need to turn them up. I’m giving everyone out there that signed up just a few more days to get us all the info we need.

If you are reading this email it means I’ve already gotten all I need from you to set you up so there is no need to do anything on your part. Just an update on whats going on as I’m sure you’re quite excited to get started. If you have a moment consider giving someone an early Christmas present and point them to https://www.shockeymonkey.com/go.asp and tell them they need to be a part of this. We don’t think we’ll be charging anyone for anything for the first few months so it might be a worth while for everyone involved..

So just to say it again, thank you, thank you, thank you. You’ve all been very patient and I’ve got all I need to set you up. Considering there are now over 2,000 people on hold we want to do all we can to get you all on at the same time and help one another make this the biggest business asset possible for 2007.

-Vlad

P.S. Please add me to your trusted senders to make sure messages from me are delivered to you. I hope you can understand that with over 2,000 people on here I will not be responding to the “ping” messages asking for status, updates, etc. Please keep an eye on the following site:

http://www.shockeymonkey.com/status.asp

JamaicasmBy the way, I got an email from Bob Nitro sporting the sexy Shockey Monkey shirt in the sunny Jamaica. Those shirts have certainly made it far around the world, if you have fun pictures with them please let me know. Girls always ask for those shirts, there is something about that monkey… I need to start a clothing line.

Exchange 2007 is Available!

Exchange
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Exchange 2007 has finally been released. It is available to Volume Licensing customers on licensing.microsoft.com.

There are no bits on MSDN or Technet yet (will be there soon) but you can get the evaluation copies already and remember that Microsoft is now distributing evaluations as VHDs as well as ISO’s. So if you want to just play with a fully configured and provisioned Exchange 2007 environment right away you can bypass the process of installing Windows 2003, then installing and configuring Exchange, etc, etc. It’s like your local personal Technet virtual lab.

Again, congratulations Microsoft.

Should IT Experts Be Held To A Higher Standard?

IT Culture
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I had another spirited debate with Ms. Bradley over the last three hours and considering the previous discussion I felt it was important you consider the following question:

Should we hold technical experts to a higher degree of responsibility for their comments?

I say yes.

There is no such thing as an award for the most opinionated professional that cannot substantiate anything with current or reputable information. There is no excuse, whatsoever, to ever misinterpret technical terms and then say “but it’s okay because in our context POP3 means POP3 connector” when the two technologies are unrelated and not interchangeable for one another.

I will say it again: If SMB IT Professionals are ever going to get respect for what they do they are going to have to earn it. “Small” is not an excuse, this is your job and you have to treat it with respect. You have to know the basics, you have to know the details, you have to support and justify your actions. You have to train, you have to document, you have to experiment and you have to act right.

The moment you devalue those basics you no longer deserve respect or anyones attention. The moment you lose your credibility is the moment at which your opinion no longer holds any value. I’d even argue that at that point you are no longer an expert but just an opinionated, yet uninformed, individual that happens to do some IT work on the side.

Have SBS Yahoo groups lost all value?

IT Culture, SMB
23 Comments

Not too long ago Yahoo SBS groups were filled with people that are at the very top of our field. From MVPs to book writers to technology experts to even Microsoft developers and test engineers, SBS Yahoo groups were the place to get your questions answered.

However, these groups seemed to have little to no moderation, encouraging clueless people to flood them with mindless conjectures, rants that should have been blog posts, direct and personal attacks and down right ignorance, criminal advice and the usual “we’re different so we don’t have to play by the rules” mindset that cripples SMB IT professionals.

I spent probably two hours this weekend trying to hopelessly explain to someone the basics of back-scatter to leave the guy with no response other than “FWIW, I know but I’m not going to tell you” – so much for the community spirit. This got compounded on by a followup poster who opens up his response by saying “Been awhile since I looked at….” and closing with “Reports I’ve heard is that…” – so no experience on the subject, no up to date knowledge, nothing to back his statement with. Why in the world did he even bother responding?

This prompted me to ask “Is this place of any value to anyone anymore?”:

Folks, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: If you’re stabbing in the dark please keep your guesses to yourself, you only make yourself look bad in front of others by certifying you don’t know what you’re talking about when you reply with meaningless conjectures, statements that you cannot back up with a link to the resources, discussions or authorative statements from someone reputable. I’m not for killing the debate, but when the debate is constantly interrupted by people that don’t have any facts, knowledge or experience you end up driving away the people that actually have a clue and something worthwhile to share.

I know the moderators of this list don’t want the bad PR associated with kicking out the repeat offenders and moderating worthless statements, but without that this community is left without experts and becomes of zero value to anyone. If we indeed are all here to learn then we need to start kicking out or silencing those who have nothing to teach or nothing meaningful to share… we’ve lost enough people here this year so can this possibly be a goal for 2007?

The sad truth is that I already know the answer – no, it’s not. At this point the only even perceived value these groups have is in counting the dead bodies after patch Tuesday and pinging a few thousand people to see if they are seeing the same problems you may not be able to see in your organizational vacuum. And to be honest, you can get that information from Susan directly usually accompanied with a resolution or history of the problem.

Speaking about SBS at TechMentor TechPartner Conference

Events, SMB
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Today I signed the final paperwork to speak at the TechPartner TechMentor conference in Orlando on March 28–29, 2007. You can find the conference details here but suffice to say this is thrown by Remond Channel Magazine (previously MCPMag) so you know its all about Microsoft and how to make money with it….

… speaking of which, my session is on Thursday, March 29, 10:15AM – 11:45 AM titled “Microsoft Small Business Server Opportunities” and I’m mostly going to cover best practices and mistakes people make in identifying and fulfilling SMB opportunities. Considering that we have the largest managed SBS deployment base out there and that I spend almost every day talking to partners and their projects/ideas you can rest assured I have a lot to talk about beyond the “Idiots Guide to SBS & Are you doing Managed Services yet?” stuff. Expect a global look at how people position, price, adjust, customize and manage SBS to make themselves more successful and their customers more happy with both the IT firm and their business process.

The title was not my choice…  I probably would have gone with something more exotic “Top 10 mistakes IT consultants make when selling into SMB”

Blast from the past

IT Culture
3 Comments

Steve Litt runs our local Orlando Linux Users Group and forwarded this gem earlier today.

REQUEST FOR QUOTE ON MULTITECH COMPUTER SYSTEM
>From Steve Litt
To Zev Gobst, Maximum Media
I’d like to purchase the following:
1 Multitech Accel 900 10 mhz computer $1450.00
complete with all MS
DOS disks and
books and all all multitech bundled
software and booklets.
1 640 killobytes RAM on motherboard. N/C
1 Color graphics board. $ 100.00
1 Sun md 3(A) color monitor “tweeked” $ 300.00
for good focus.
1 1.2 meg floppy in A: N/C
1 360 kb floppy in B: 85.00
1 40 megabyte seagate 35 millisecond hard drive C: $ 675.00
1 “Smart one” internal 1200 baud modem. $ 125.00
1 Parallel printer port (centronics) N/C
1 RS232 serial port. $ 45.00

subtotal $2780.00
state tax 6.5% $ 180.70
total $2960.70

Notice the price.. Now also notice that for roughly 1/4 of that price you can get more than an adequate machine to run Windows Vista Ultimate. Yes, it has been a long time since someone spec’ed out a system with a 1.2MB 5 1/4 floppy drive but the way we approach computing these days has changed significantly as well. The hardware is keeping up with software and… well, you can’t argue you get a whole lot more bang for your buck in 2006. Notice there is an extra charge for a serial port!

Nice to have some perspective, isn’t it?

SBS CAL Activations Not Working

Microsoft, SMB
1 Comment

Straight from da man:

We’ve had several reports of SBS CAL activations failing.  We’re currently looking in to the situation and will post an update here as soon as we have more information.  This only affects CALs at this point, server and all other product activations are working properly.

This one got me as well, so if you call to activate by phone you’ll experience the same issue. The CSR I spoke to had me reboot because they could not validate the installation ID. Upon reboot the new installation ID did not work either so just hold on for now and wait for an update from the SBS Team Blog.

P.S. Ask them where Inside SBS Podcast went. It’s dead, isn’t it? Ooooh, they are just too busy with work to provide me with entertainment, for free? Totally unacceptable! Put down everything you’re doing and entertain me you monkey!

Oh, no, not talking about the SBS Show at all here

Article on tar-pitting and back-scatter

Exchange
1 Comment

I just finished writing a slightly longer article about the principles of tar-pitting and back-scatter over on the Own Web Now Blog.

As mentioned earlier, more of the serious business related stuff will be happening over there. Here is a link to our RSS feed. You might want to keep an eye on that, not necessarily because you’d want to become our customer but because you can learn how we go about things and see how we communicate important events in the IT world directly to our customers and clients.

December is traditionally the lowest SPAM month of the year for us. As people leave their offices and spend less time on non-deadline-driven projects the amount of junk mail goes down as well. So if there ever was a time to do mail server maintenance, December would be it. 

No Outlook for you! Exchange 2007 Licensing Change

Exchange
8 Comments

Nothing ruins a great product launch like brilliant Microsoft licensing. Exchange 2007 will be no different, take a look at whats raising the blood pressure around Exchange communities:

Outlook 2007 grant for Exchange Server 2003 CAL customers

Unlike prior versions, Exchange Server 2007 Standard or Enterprise does not include the right to install Outlook on devices for which CALs are obtained. However, for each Exchange Server CAL, Core CAL Suite or Enterprise CAL Suite with active Software Assurance coverage as of November 30, 2006, customers will be granted one Office Outlook 2007 license. The right to use Outlook under that license expires upon expiration of the corresponding CAL. Use of Outlook under this offering is subject to the customers’ license agreement and the product use rights for that product. If Software Assurance coverage on the corresponding CAL is maintained continuously (i.e., renewed with no lapse in coverage), and one later version of Office Outlook (i.e., N+1, where N=Office Outlook 2007) is made available prior to the expiration of that coverage, customers’ license will be for that version instead. Alternatively, customers are eligible to acquire Software Assurance coverage for that Office Outlook license, provided that coverage is acquired by February 28, 2007. Customers who wish to acquire Software Assurance coverage for Office Outlook after that date must first acquire a new license for the version of Office Outlook that is current at the time coverage is acquired.

So unless you were on Microsoft Exchange 2003 with Software Assurance by November 30th, 2006 you will not be getting a copy of Outlook 2007 when you upgrade to Microsoft Exchange 2007.

This is going to pose a significant problem for companies that have budgeted Microsoft Exchange 2007 purchase but have not made plans to move to Microsoft Office 2007.

My Opinion:

This is either brilliant or idiotic, I am not sure which. On one hand, this will force the customers to see even more value in Software Assurance, a program that has been seen by many as a relatively worthless set of benefits with no worth-while upgrades over the past few years. On the other hand, this eliminates Microsoft Outlook as the defacto Microsoft Exchange user interface and shifts more users to OWA and Windows Mobile.

End game? Microsoft gets more Software Assurance subscribers but opens the door wide open for Open Office. Now if they were just smart enough to create a web-only desktop and integrate OWA with the productivity tools at Office Online…. Wait, wasn’t that  Google’s supposed plan all along? Booya!