It’s a race.. and speed matters.

Boss, GTD, IT Business, Shockey Monkey
Comments Off on It’s a race.. and speed matters.

On Monday I posted the following Facebook update:


By Wednesday, all of the code, bugfix and testing were in place and Shockey Monkey was rocking the 2013 version of clippy. Whether you loved or loathed Clippy, the idea was brilliant but the implementation was terrible (“Are you trying to use Excel?” No shit, what did you think, I just clicked on the wrong icon and I’m about to ask a talking paperclip about what else I can do to waste my time?)

The brilliant implementation came from Angry Birds. It is not uncommon to see 2 or 3 year olds playing these games – that they have never seen – and suceeding at moving through the levels even before they have the ability to walk or run.

I’ll let you sit there with your mind blown for a minute.

All of these applications that are available in the Web 2.0 world have one thing in common: They suck. Ok, two things in common: They are ridiculously simplistic. They are nice to get started but when you need to tweak things a little bit things get astronomically complex.

Problem is: How do you build a mature and feature sophisticated web application / platform that anyone can use (anyone that has never used your system before)?

You walk them through it.

I have been bouncing around the concept in my head for months.

Last week I ran my doodles by the management, asked for feedback, talked to a few of the Shockey Monkey resellers and on Monday I drew it up.

On Tuesday it was being written and put into production.

On Wednesday at 3PM it was being published.

That is how quickly stuff is being added here (more info on that in a bit)

Shockey Monkey Welcome

The biggest problem we have with Shockey Monkey is that people sign up for it but don’t know how to use it to it’s fullest immediately or how to get started.

They sold themselves the dream of managing their business better but there are few things that need to happen first: adding employees, setting policies, setting branding, configuring products, companies, clients, etc.

Wouldn’t it be nice if someone held your hand through all that?

That is called consulting. Or in laymans terms, that’s called shitty software: When your solution is so complex and broken that it takes a mountain of people to glue the shit together to meet basic operational onboarding requirements (See: Anything powered by Oracle, Every SharePoint or CRM product ever made)

Not that I have a problem with that at all, it’s just that people get angry when they realize that they not only overpaid for the product but have to overpay for someone to put it together for them. It’s kind of like eating out and paying for the same meal 6 times without ever actually getting the first bite.

Well, not with Shockey Monkey. When you first sign up for your portal and start it.. you go through a 5 minute onboarding process. Yes, 5 minutes. Hey there, how you doing, put some data in me:


While the user is waiting for the magical stuff to happen in the background (as we push the unicorns into the meat grinder tail first, trust me on this) they are rolling through 3-5 second previews of what it looks like to manage employees, which features are available, etc.

Nothing excessive, just a glance. I just want them to have a taste of what it will look like so they will know once they interact with it for the first time.


When the images scroll through, we do the first intelligence test..

The toolbar checks on their ability to recognize an input button that is clickable. It has a giant green arrow pointing to the Next button.. and if you can’t figure this out.. well, that’s the Darwin law in full effect baby.



Let’s see if you can hit the piggy

So here we go.. The first thing you need to do when you get to Shockey Monkey is make it your own. This wizard hides all the other complex stuff but gives you an idea and a feel for how the controls behave, interact and manage. If you can fill out these basic things then configuring the rest of the stuff is cake.


It’s damn near impossible to break this.


Back to selling the dream..


More dream…


Even more stuff you can manage with Shockey Monkey – for free.


And now you’re done. Need help? I’ll call you and sell it to you. Want to figure it out on your own? Be my guest. The point is to make the thing simple enough for anyone to use and to be a ring away when you need help.

Why is this important at all Vlad, how about some Exchange insight?

The reason this is important is that this is your next level of business service delivery.

Long gone are the days of you collecting high 2 or 3 digit per hour fees for consulting someone on what kind of tablet they need. That job is now done by a teenager at the Apple store. Or Verizon. Or AT&T. Or Target. Or Best Buy. Or Costco. You get the idea, gadgets and junk and IT gatekeeper has passed and if you want to grow and grow your revenues you need to step into the actual service delivery.

Shockey Monkey is the platform for the delivery of that service. We are integrating Exchange, SharePoint, Offsite Backups, iPhone, iPad, Android, Printers, document management and everything above and beyond it into it. It’s just a screen. Who organizes it, manages continuity and helps people gain insight into the business – that is the person that will continue to collect high reoccuring monthly fees long after “printer problems” are synonymous with “typewriter problems, keys keep jamming”



You have the skills, use them on the next level. If all your tools are available to all your competitors and the vendor is trying to beat you to the client as well then isn’t it time to think smarter than just betting on your charm and relying on the kindness of strangers?

Snap out of it Blanche!

Get some Monkey, learn it inside and out and then call me and figure out how to sell it.

We are not making this stuff happening so fast because we’re bored and there is nothing on TV: the demand is out there and as much of a business transformation as the MSP space saw with the Autotask/Tigerpaw/CW/etc you can deliver to any business out there that has issues with employees, clients, vendors, contractors, manages problems/cases/agreements/invoices and wants to get a better control of those.

You’re welcome.